Long Distance Child Custody Arrangements
As long as you keep your eye on the ball, long distance custody arrangements are possible.
Long distance child custody arrangements happen for a variety of reasons. Maybe your ex got a job out of state or you were already living separately when the divorce occurred. It’s not unheard of to have long distance custody arrangements, it just takes some extra planning to make everything work.
Keeping Kids Top Priority
While the calendar is pretty easy to split up, when you keep the children at the top of the priority list the calendar becomes more complicated. Obviously, if kids are enrolled in school, it’s best for them to continue their education in the same school moving forward. And to let them stay in the same home for the duration of the school year.
Now, if your kids are using online or virtual school, this can be much more flexible. Due to the pandemic, there has been a major rise in virtual schooling and families that travel full time. If your kids are already doing school online and thriving with that process, you can split up the calendar easier.
In addition to education, kids have sports teams or other regular events or activities they have come to know. Divorce is stressful for everyone and the more you can do to keep your children’s routine as regular as possible will help alleviate more stress.
Creativity Counts for a Lot!
If you and your ex live more than a car ride away from one another, you might decide that the kids can stay with you during the schoolyear, and then your ex gets them for the summer.
Just keep in mind that giving all holidays to the other person isn’t fair for anyone. You deserve to spend some holidays and vacations with your kids as well! It’s not just the flat count of days but the quality of those days. There is a world of difference between 30 days where you are working and the kids are in school all day vs 30 days of vacation time!
Avoid the Blame Game
It will be easy to blame whichever parent “left” the area that your kids were living. Don’t fall for that bait. In the vast majority of cases, both parents love and want to do what’s best for their kids. Job opportunities and other reasons that are critical enough to move away from your kids are painful for the person leaving. Chances are that if you were still married, you would have all moved as a family. Life is just different now and so avoid the blame game as much as possible. It isn’t helpful and if anything, just diminishes your relationship with your children.
Instead, be proactive about solutions that work the best for everyone.