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Divorce may not be the only option for California couples

Many California people find that marriage is more complicated than what they expected, and that living happily-ever-after is not guaranteed. Some advisers say that entering into a marriage by accepting that there will be challenges could prevent spouses filing for divorce at the first obstacle. When problems arise, the options include staying and hoping it will blow over, separating to get perspective or filing for divorce. The ideal situation would be finding solutions together and avoiding divorce, but that is not always possible.

If a couple chooses to separate with the intention to use distance to allow each party to get perspective, they might succeed in rebuilding their marriage. However, advisers say it is essential to be honest about the reason for seeking a separation. Rather than leaving the other spouse with expectations that all will be fine after a timeout, it might be fair to warn him or her if the separation time will serve to detach emotionally from the marriage in preparation for a divorce.

A controlled separation with ongoing communication might serve to bring spouses together again, and consulting with marriage counselors may aid the process. However, some reasons for separation -- such as a total breakdown of trust or some form of abuse -- are seldom repairable. If divorce seems to be the only solution, it might be possible to make it an amicable one.

Knowing that the support and guidance of an experienced divorce attorney is available throughout both the separation and the divorce process may bring some comfort. A California lawyer can provide valuable advice, and if appropriate to the client's circumstances, he or she may arrange for an impartial divorce mediator to help with resolving issues or negotiating a settlement agreement. Additional resources in an experienced divorce lawyer's arsenal may include professionals to advise on matters related to finances, taxes, real estate, estate planning and child-related issues.

Source:, "Do You Know When to Divorce?", Cathy Meyer, Accessed on Jan. 26, 2018

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